Okay, so I’m tired and I don’t really want to write a blog, my life is a mess, my uncle hates me and most of my family see me as a failure and no matter what I do I can’t prove them wrong, that’s the reason I’m writing this because if I don’t then my excuses will catch up with me and I will end up ranting about how useless I feel. Everybody makes excuses, if only to excuse themselves… they make them for people and to people. I know that I do. My uncle constantly berates me about it, telling me “there are reasons and then there are results” I don’t know about you but doesn’t that seem a little ironic, I mean come on, if we didn’t have reasons, of why we had (or had not) done something, then nothing would be done, so… logically, that is wrong.
Wait, sorry… got that quote wrong, the actual quote is: “there are reasons and then there are results, the reasons don’t matter.” Well that’s a quote for people with little or no imagination, people who think outside the square, instead of changing said square into something more dynamic, like an oval or maybe a giraffe…
People seem to believe that everybody is equal and that life is meaningful, that we should have a purpose but if you look at the tangled web of reality then you will realise that life has no purpose and that we are all different, we can’t be equal, that doesn’t work because some skills are valued above others which automatically tells you that equality and fairness don’t exist in this godforsaken world. The fact is that we only have a purpose if we think that we have a purpose I mean could you tell me what the purpose of life is? I mean the real purpose not some bullshit religious dogma that you read in a book that was written by a man who says exactly what god did even though he wasn’t alive when god did it. No you can’t… nobody can, not one single soul knows the real reason we are here, nobody could tell me anything about life’s purpose because it doesn’t have one. We live, we die… and all the rest is nothing but in between the beginning and the end. So should I really have to do anything if I look at life like that? No, no I don’t think I should. But the facts remain that I have to eat to live and that puts me in a very difficult position.
And no… my decisions are not based upon anything but the knowledge I have, which is small considering the scale of the world but I’m tired of listening to people tell me how I should run my life, remember people life is not a competition, life is a myriad of stories tangled together from the years that slowly pass us by. There is no winner, there is no loser, all there is, is joy and sorrow. So if there are people who think that just because they are older then me it makes them wiser then me I tell them to go F*** themselves because what they don’t understand is I do know what they are trying to tell me, the fact is we live in the now, not the past, not the future but the present and if they were in my place at my age they would all feel the same, (maybe not all but most.) you think I don’t know that there are others like me, I don’t need anybody to tell me that because most of them are my friends. If you try to comfort me by saying things like “when you get to my age,” that isn’t going to help because I’m not your age and I might never be your age, I might never be older then I am now. So please stop telling me things that don’t help me. (yes I am actually talking about someone specific , my uncle in fact, even though he won’t ever read this.)
Sometimes I think that I’m an idiot, but now I’ve outdone myself, because this blog was supposed to be about excuses and was actually about the problems of how “adults” have forgotten what it felt like to be teenagers, they tend to forget we are what we are and we can’t be less or more then that.
P.S. In case you aren’t aware this blog is aptly named because it is an excuse, well actually it is many excuses put together if you didn’t spot it after the fourth paragraph then you are exactly like me and actually believe what is in it ( and yes, I love contradicting myself.) goodbye!
